In old age, if you have 4 cards, you are not afraid of the bleak night scene. Many people fail to do one.

time:2023-01-29 author:Family life
In old age, if you have 4 cards, you are not afraid of the bleak night scene. Many people fail to do one.

There is such a sentence in "Shi Lin Guang Ji": "Raising children to prevent old age, and accumulating grain to prevent hunger." Since ancient times, the concept of raising children to prevent old age has been deeply rooted in the hearts of the people. The most justifiable reason for patriarchal preference. I asked many people around me about their views on old age, and most of them still adhere to the idea of ​​raising children to prevent old age, thinking that relying on children is the best choice after getting old. "You raise my ego to raise you old! What do we work so hard for? Don't we just hope that our children will have a future and can support themselves. Do we have something to rely on when we get old?" "What kind of money do you save? Money No matter how much more, I can only go to a nursing home and ask someone to take care of them. Are those people reliable with their own children? I don’t know what happened if I was deceived or bullied. I would rather spend my money on my children, Let them be grateful to me and take good care of me when they are old." "I think it's not that the idea of ​​raising children to prevent old age is outdated, but that many parents themselves don't want to be a good parent, don't want to pay for their children, but when they get old, they think Relying on the status of parents to manage what children want and want. Fathers are kind and filial to their children. You don’t love your children, and you demand so much. How can there be such a good thing in the world?” Hu Shi said: “If we want to receive good results in the future, we must work hard. Sow the new cause of the present. One seed by one, there will be a full warehouse and a full house." Indeed, fathers are kind and filial to their sons, and they must be raised first and then supported. Unfilial children are directly related to their parents being unqualified. If you spoil your children so badly that they don't know how to be grateful, they will naturally be unreliable when they are old and have to worry about them. If you treat your children badly, fail to fulfill your responsibilities as a parent at all, and are not treated well by your children, you will be punished, which is normal. When people are in their old age, they have 4 hole cards, and they are not afraid of the bleak night scene. Many people fail to do one. When you were young, you acted recklessly, and if you didn't cherish the people in front of you, and you didn't cherish yourself, you were digging holes for your old age.

First, if you keep your family, you will keep those who care about you;

After losing his wife, Mr. Du cried After dying, he was seriously ill, and the people around him could not comfort him. "I've been married to her for 40 years. When I was so poor, my parents thought I was worthless, they kicked my family out, sold my only house that could keep out the wind and rain, and went with the money. The other son was at home. She didn't dislike me. She took my son to leave the country with me, and went to work in the shipyard with me. Those jobs are hard for me as a big man, but she has to take care of the children and work with me at the same time. Live to make money." The couple have lived together through thick and thin for 40 years. They have raised their son and have grandchildren. After all their hardships came to an end. A disease took away Mr. Du's wife, which made it difficult for Mr. Du to accept. Fortunately, Mr. Du's son is very filial. After taking care of his mother's funeral, he and his daughter-in-law took Mr. Du away and let Mr. Du live with them. He hoped that the company of his children and grandchildren could soothe Mr. Du's wounds. As Luo Zhenyu said: "A glass of water at three in the morning, mutual company in old age, mutual support in difficult times, this is the meaning of marriage." The person who may not dislike you and who is willing to take care of you may be your spouse. Married as husband and wife, the white heads are not separated, share weal and woe, and be together until old age, which may be the best look of marriage. However, a good marriage needs to be cherished. The premise of his goodness to you is based on the fact that you are good to him and worthy of your family. If you patronize yourself and be happy, you are not good to the other half, or even hurt him, then when he sees you, all he thinks of is grievance and pain, and it is normal for you to be bad. Moreover, you are not good to the other half, which leads to a marital crisis, and also destroys the family of your children. If you become the main culprit in destroying your children's family, and your children blame you, you may stop relying on your children when you are old.

Second, there is no dutiful son before the bed for a long time, and a good body can not only make oneself comfortable, but also reduce the burden on children and grandchildren;

Having no dutiful sons before the bed for a long time does not mean that the parents are sick and the children despise their parents and refuse to take care of their parents, but they really cannot afford it. Let's not talk about how much money it takes to see a doctor, but about the time and energy needed to take care of the patient. As a person who has reached middle age, there are old and young people, and how difficult it is. As a past person, you know very well. If you are lingering on the sick bed and cannot be separated from others 24 hours a day, your children must have someone to take care of you and be unable to work. They may have conflicts with their spouses, and it is difficult for them to bear such a lot of pressure. Besides, if you are tormented by illness all day long, your mind and spirit are affected, your actions are hindered, you can't eat and eat, you can't go out to play, and you can't see money being spent like water, this kind of old age is not what you want. Yes! Some diseases are natural disasters that cannot be avoided. Some diseases are caused by your own failure to take care of your body, wanton actions, and careless maintenance.

Third, if you have money in your hand, you can spend it more freely, which can also reduce disputes with your children and grandchildren;

Those who ask for money The taste is really uncomfortable, even if the other party is your child, you feel very uncomfortable. Money is the most prone to disputes. If you are just over 500 years old and need to be supported by your children, your children will be under the double pressure of adopting parents and raising children, and it will be difficult for children to bear. My parents are in their fifties this year. My mother can receive more than 2,000 pensions every month. I am the only daughter who still works in the factory. My mother once told me: "Although you can make money, you don't need us. It’s a burden, but we may need to save a little more money, so that when we get sick in the future, we can bear part of it ourselves, you don’t need to be so tired, and your husband won’t have too many opinions.” If you are still young, Try not to be idle as much as possible, and earn a little more while you can, not only to reduce the burden on your children, but also to leave a way out for yourself.

Fourth, have a good attitude, adapt to loneliness, and believe that children and grandchildren will have their own blessings.

The reason why many people feel that the idea of ​​raising children to prevent old age is outdated, because they cannot deal with the other half of their children, such as the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. In fact, you may have trouble dealing with your daughter-in-law, probably because you manage too much. When a daughter-in-law is married, she is the hostess of the family and has the right to decide the affairs of her own small family. If you are unwilling to let go in time and continue to issue orders to your children and grandchildren, you may conflict with them, and conflicts will arise, making your son in a dilemma. The book "The Apple Tree That Grows Forever" wrote: "Whether parents let go or not, adult children will one day set up a new family, with their own children, their own jobs, their own dreams, and their own We have our own vast world and our own future world.” Children and grandchildren have their own blessings, and many times, regardless of children and grandchildren, let them solve their own lives by themselves, and it is you who enjoy the happiness. END. Topic of the day: What do you think is the most needed trump card for retirement? Feel free to share your views in the comments section.
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