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In a relationship, what should I do in the face of the ruthless betrayal of my partner? #ZHANG Tianai exposes Xu Kaicheng's recording# When I was looking at my phone yesterday, a hot search popped up. It was a Weibo post by Zhang Tianai: "Reciprocal offender", I hope all girls keep their eyes open. I'm sure a lot of people have seen it. The man had a relationship with other women through his own drunkenness, and now he begs for forgiveness. But judging from the apology recordings made public on the Internet, the man did not recognize his fault positively after being found to be betrayed, and kept changing the subject, crying and saying that he was sad and guilty. Hypocritical performances, repentance in the form of reciting lines, he took a fancy to the soft heart and fragility of women, and wanted to be forgiven by betraying his misery. If he really believed in his tears, then what awaited you would be a dark life. It can be seen from Zhang Tianai's public recording and the accompanying text "Reciprocal Offender" that this is not the first time he has betrayed this man, and she herself said that she has forgiven him. Why do men still make such mistakes after forgiveness? Does it really answer the old saying, "Does it happen once, there will be countless times?" Today, the talented person is here to chat with you. What should I do when my partner is repeatedly betrayed? Should I choose to forgive? Someone did a survey and asked if they would forgive their partner's betrayal. Ninety percent of the people would choose not to forgive, but among the ninety percent of them, more than half of them said they would not forgive, but they would still be soft-hearted and controlled. I can't help myself, and I choose to forgive under the soft and hard bubbles of men. Facing the betrayal of the person we love the most, the hysterical anger, the piercing pain, the unbearable sadness, we can only watch, only those who really experience it know how tormented, feelings are like shoes, whether they fit or not. Grinding feet, only you know. Once you find that your partner has betrayed, it means that the balance of this relationship is already out of balance, and high and low levels have already appeared in this relationship, and intimacy must be built on an equal position. Whether you choose to forgive or not, the most important thing is to let yourself learn to deal with the pain and trauma caused by these injuries, and to help yourself heal is the most important thing to do. If you choose to forgive, even if your emotions are temporarily eased, in the days to come, you will live in suspicion and suspicion every day. If you stay in the toilet for a long time, you will think: is he replying to other women's messages; when the other party comes home later, you will imagine a big drama. Such suspicion will only make him more and more miserable. If you choose not to forgive and leave this relationship, the feeling of trusting the other person but being betrayed still exists, and it is likely to be carried into the next relationship. For example, when you start a new relationship, you always think: Will he also betray me? Once the other party disappears for a while, you will start to associate, and you will involuntarily bring the hurt you suffered in the previous relationship into the current relationship, all kinds of doubts and distrust, and even control men in various ways, check the mobile phone to find out the location, that is To prevent another betrayal. These are all just deepening your own pain. What you really need to learn is to make yourself stronger and empower yourself, rather than clinging to a relationship. When encountering the betrayal of the other party, you can try to think from these aspects: 1. Accept the facts and calm down your emotions. Many people will lose control of their emotions after finding out that their partner is betrayed. They stand on the moral point of condemning men and swear in all kinds of ways. , the teacher can understand this feeling very well, but such an angry feeling will make each other lose rational communication. The betrayal is already a fact, no matter how much you scold it, it can't be changed. To accept the betrayal of a man, this man has already hurt him. If you spend more time on him, you are wasting your emotions. You can't count on this man. Come to heal you, and don't feel that you are not good enough to be loved. All you have to do is to control your emotions and let yourself think calmly: where is the source of the betrayal and how to deal with it next. 2. Don't believe in a man's affectionate drama, and put the initiative in his own hands. When men are found to be betrayed, most of them will stage an emotional drama, expressing their sadness and guilt, such as hugging you and crying, kneeling on the ground and begging You forgive and tell you that it's just an impulse, he will only love you alone in his life, as long as you can forgive him, you can do anything to make amends, and you will never do it again in the future. The reason why he would beg your forgiveness is to hold on to your soft-hearted and fragile psychology. If you believe in his affectionate performance and start to persuade yourself, then you will find that there is only more pain waiting for you. It's human nature. Therefore, you must put the initiative in your own hands. Whether you want to leave or continue, you will not let him, and don't be easily moved by his affectionate drama. 3. Believe that you will harvest happy feelings. Whether you choose to separate or continue, you must put more attention on yourself and heal yourself, so that the recovery is the most stable. Many people, after being betrayed, will fall into a kind of thought that they will never be happy again, and have no hope for their relationship. Know that the center of your life is you, not the man, keep faith in yourself, don't doubt yourself, always trust your feelings. Choosing a relationship is never to torture yourself, but to make yourself grow and become a better person. I also have many students. After being betrayed, after doing the first few steps, they put their mind and energy on themselves. Not only did they distract themselves, their careers also flourished, and they became more confident. Finally, I will look back at this When a man, he is no longer worthy of himself. Have a little more confidence and patience in yourself, and live with hope and confidence. Follow your heart, whether you choose to leave or continue, you need to heal your wounds and get out of the shadow of being betrayed, so that you can harvest happier feelings. |