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Wise people, when they are old, will not say these three "good words" to their children Text/Xia Mo 01. FrontispieceTime flies and urges people to grow old. When you reach your old age, learn to control your mouth and grasp the sense of proportion in your speech, and you will live a happier life. When people get along with each other, many things are easily promised, and it is easy for people to have expectations. Especially with children. When people are old, getting along with their children is a kind of wisdom. Munir said: "The real happiness and joy of life is immersed in the close family relationship." In old age, if there are many children, as a parent, you must learn to maintain balance among them and unite your children. Don't resent each other because of misunderstanding, jealousy, and scramble, and let the family become estranged. Wise people, when they are old, will not say these three "good words" to their children for the sake of family unity.02. Don't promise your family's property to anyone.On the road of life, no matter how much wealth you have, don't promise your children casually who the wealth belongs to. Because between children, it is easy to cause infighting due to the uneven distribution of parents' property. At the same time, it is also easy for children to develop the habit of getting something for nothing. Su Daqiang and his wife in "It's All Good" prefer their two sons, which makes their daughter Su Mingyu suffer a lot of grievances. However, under the doting of his parents, Su Mingcheng became an "old man". He often relied on making his mother happy, and he got a lot of financial help from her. His mother's behavior often made Su Mingcheng feel that as long as he acts like a spoiled child, he can rely on his parents for the rest of his life. It seems that Su Mingcheng is very happy, but his mother passed away, and he has no backer. The pressure of life made him feel confused and didn't know how to live. After that, he invested blindly, lost all his belongings, and became the one with the worst life among the brothers and sisters. In the face of children, parents should not treat their children with "preference to sons" and favor one person, but should treat them equally. Don't subsidize your savings to anyone, but encourage your children to work hard, and be truly responsible for your children's lives. Moreover, children can help each other on the road of life in the future when they exert their strengths, become independent and self-improvement, and work hard on their own.03. Don't over-praise who's hospitality is betterIn the later years, go to live at your children's house. Dissatisfaction caused by comparison. Shakespeare said: "Don't say anything when you think about it, you must think twice about everything." Children all want to be the best in their parents' eyes, and they all care about the evaluation from their parents, no matter how old the children are. If parents only say that one of their children is the best, then the other children will be very disappointed, and it is very likely that jealousy will arise. Children who are not valued are easy to give up on themselves and feel that no matter what they do, they will not be recognized by their parents. It's better to distance yourself from siblings and parents, and stop expecting warmth from family affection. Or, because of jealousy, they are unwilling to get along well with siblings who are valued by their parents. Deliberately looking for trouble with him, or maliciously slandering him, or even fighting. These are, in fact, the last thing parents want to see. So, as a parent, learn to keep your mouth shut and don't arbitrarily comment on who is better for parents or which child is more promising. Instead, each child should have different encouragement and appreciation to unite the children. Brothers and sisters can get along more harmoniously without comparison.04. Don't casually say who you prefer more.As parents, when you get old, get along with your children, don't casually say who you prefer more. At any time, do not show partiality, because it will lead to conflicts and contradictions between children. Psychologist Freud said: "There is no such thing as slips of the tongue. All slips of the tongue are the true revelation of the subconscious." Some children, who are successful, do not have much time to stay at home and give their parents more care. And some children, although they do nothing, but when their parents need someone to take care of him, he is always by his side. Every child has a different personality, and every child has different achievements and social status. Some children may have a sweeter mouth and can make the elderly happy. Although some are introverted and do not speak much, they have achieved filial piety with practical actions. Children have their own strengths and weaknesses, and parents should look at them from an objective perspective. Don't hold the highs and step on the lows, and don't arbitrarily accuse any child of being unpromising. When people are old, they don't favor any child, and they don't favor anyone. Keep your words cautious and treat your children with the same attitude, so that they can live in harmony. Smart parents don't always praise a child. Instead, tell them that everyone's existence has meaning, and everyone should live their own wonderful life.05. SummaryAs people grow old, they should speak well, get along with their children, and grasp the sense of proportion in speaking. Master Ji Xianlin said: "People have to say the right words, the meaningful words, and the words that are beneficial to progress, so that people can be convinced." Parents are the most important people in a child's life. Parents' thoughts and opinions often affect children's lives. So, think twice when you speak. Keep your mouth shut and don't comment on each child's right and wrong in front of them. No matter whether you are poor or rich, let your children love each other and help each other, and life will be better and better. The relationship between siblings, closeness or distance, actually has a lot to do with the education of parents and the way they treat their children. When people are old, worry less and say what they say will help the children to unite and help each other. Children, get along well, the life of the big family will be better. -END- Author: Xia Mo, a cutting-edge emotional tutor, a psychologist, an emotional writer with over 1 billion people on the Internet, a manager of a happy woman, focusing on emotions, gender, mother-in-law and daughter-in-law for more than ten years. |