I promised my in-laws to come to the Mid-Autumn Festival, and when I saw the 7 packages they carried with me, I would take the children back to their parents’ house.

time:2023-01-29 02:53:23source:novahomeonline.com author:Conjugal life
I promised my in-laws to come to the Mid-Autumn Festival, and when I saw the 7 packages they carried with me, I would take the children back to their parents’ house.

There is a saying on the Internet: "The so-called good relationship comes from one person's tolerance and accommodation, and the other person's moderation." In life, you need to learn to compromise. If you are preoccupied with trivial matters, you will not give in an inch. , then others will also think that you are unreasonable, that you are too tired to get along with you, that you are too selfish to get along with you. In some things, taking a step back can open up the world. You back down, the other party understands that enough is enough, and your relationship can be harmonious. However, if the other party doesn’t know how to stop when it is enough, but because of your concessions, you feel that you are easy to talk and to be careful. If you want to make further progress, you will be forced to make further concessions and get the benefits you want. At this time, you have to tell him that this is an illusion. Not easy to handle. When you are in a hurry, you choose to let it succeed and let him take advantage of it. His desires will only swell, and he will never know his satisfaction. You will only be more reckless when dealing with those who are good-natured and bullied. . You choose to let him hit a hard nail, one kick to the iron plate, let him taste the pain, he will understand that you are not easy to mess with, he will not do things that hurt others and not himself. As there is a sentence in the movie "Blacklist": "Why do others dare to do bad things to you, because you make people feel that doing bad things to you can be done without paying any price." "You and your children have gone back to their parents' home. , how do you celebrate this Mid-Autumn Festival? Didn't you say yes, let my parents come to the Mid-Autumn Festival and reunite?" Hearing her husband's accusation, Ms. Yang asked back, "Did your parents come to the Mid-Autumn Festival, or did you You really think I don't know if you're here to live and retire for the elderly, don't you! Don't you really know what your parents plan to do?", leaving her husband speechless.

01. I agree to let my in-laws come over to celebrate the Mid-Autumn Festival and reunite with the family, but I didn't say that they should come for the elderly. You think I'm easy to bully? Bar!

As early as the end of August, my husband has been telling Ms. Yang that the Mid-Autumn Festival, like the Spring Festival, is a festival with a meaning of reunion. Due to the epidemic, it was unrealistic for the couple to go back. Therefore, the old man wanted to come home to celebrate the Mid-Autumn Festival. Ms. Yang didn't have much objection to her husband's request. After all, it's normal to be filial to your parents, and it's normal for her in-laws to want to reunite with the family. So, in early September, Ms. Yang bought train tickets for her in-laws and asked them to come to the provincial capital for the festival. On September 8th, after Ms. Yang got off work, she saw her in-laws at home, but she saw the scene that made her feel deceived. "In the living room, there are not only my husband and in-laws, but also seven bags and in-laws' paraphernalia. What is this doing, needless to say? Obviously, if they are here for the holidays, they are only staying for a week, take If I go back with the return ticket I bought, then I need so many things?” Obviously, the in-laws came this time, and the family reunion during the Mid-Autumn Festival was just a pretense. Their purpose was to provide for the elderly, and they planned to stay and not leave. Seeing that Ms. Yang was back, her face was not good-looking. The husband also explained to Ms. Yang that the parents wanted to live for a longer period of time, so they had to pack so many things, so that Ms. Yang should not be angry, and asked Ms. Yang to clean up her daughter's room. , to help her parents settle down, which made Ms. Yang angry.

02. It's not that I can't tolerate them, but that they are there. It's my daughter who is wronged. As a mother, I have no choice;

Twelve years ago, Ms. Yang married her husband and decided to buy a house in the provincial capital. She hoped that both of them would help. However, her in-laws felt that it was unnecessary and that living in a big city was too stressful. She hoped that her son would return to his hometown. Settling in third-tier cities, they lived at home and took care of each other. In the end, at the insistence of Ms. Yang, they had a house with three bedrooms. "If the home is big enough and my in-laws are reasonable and easy to get along with, I wouldn't mind living with them, but I can't get along with them in harmony with their patriarchal thinking." Ten years ago, Yang The lady gave birth to a daughter, and her in-laws were very unhappy. Although she served Ms. Yang for confinement, she kept talking about asking for another one and letting them hold her grandson all day long, which made Ms. Yang who was still in confinement feel very blocked. Heart. "I didn't say I didn't want a second child. It should be decided by my husband and me, not by their patriarchal thinking! Besides, who can guarantee that the second child is really a son? What about a daughter? I I don't understand, the mother-in-law who urges her grandson so hard is not a woman? Why can't she look down on my daughter?" Seeing that Ms. Yang had been indifferent and refused to have a second child, her in-laws pushed even harder, taking care of her granddaughter. Very careless, I would rather run out to play mahjong, and ignore my granddaughter. As a result, Ms. Yang's daughter was scalded by boiling water, and Ms. Yang was so angry that she drove her in-laws back to their hometown. 6 years ago, Ms. Yang gave birth to a second child under her husband's hard work. It was a son. Her in-laws were very happy and proposed to bring the child, but Ms. Yang refused. "With their patriarchal attitude, they are bound to treat my son and daughter differently. My daughter is already old, she can perceive it, and she must suffer grievances. No one will be allowed to hurt my girl, she is also my sweetheart." In the end, Ms. Yang invited her mother to help take care of a pair of children, and when she had time, she would bring the children to visit her in-laws, who came to live occasionally for a while, Ms. Yang is also acceptable.

03. Either your patriarchal parents who are unwilling to repent and leave, or I will take the children out of the way, you choose!

In dealing with her in-laws over the years, Ms. Yang is very clear that their patriarchal ideology has long been engraved into the bone marrow, and they will never repent. "They don't have any money to give them money. We give alimony every month, and we also gave 10,000 red envelopes for the new year. It's not unaffordable. They have to give 1,000 to my son and 100 to my daughter. After the New Year's money, both sisters and brothers can make trouble once." "At home, I educate my son to know how to give pears to Kong Rong. As a man, we must respect my elder sister. My daughter is very kind to my younger brother. My younger brother shares, and I take my younger brother to play. When I prepare things, I also prepare two copies, and there is no shortage of anyone. When it comes to my in-laws, it is either only my son's, or my daughter's robbed for my son, right?" This time , When the in-laws arrive and want to live at home, they will occupy the granddaughter's boudoir as soon as they come up, and make Ms. Yang's daughter share a room with her parents. Obviously, they can't change it. "I promised my in-laws to come to the Mid-Autumn Festival, and when I saw the 7 packages they had with me, I would take the children back to their parents' home. Since they can't change it, the preference for sons over daughters will inevitably hurt my daughter, so I can't live with my daughter under the same roof. No one will allow my daughter to be wronged, and I will never allow the sibling relationship that I have painstakingly cultivated to be destroyed. The child is my bottom line, and whoever dares to touch it, I will never turn my face." "Either you. Parents who prefer sons over daughters and refuse to repent will leave, or I will take the children out of the way, you choose!" Seeing the firm attitude of his wife, Ms. Yang's husband had no choice but to agree to send his parents away after the Mid-Autumn Festival, and Ms. Yang planned to Wait until the in-laws are gone, and then go back.

04. As an elder, if you can't change your backward thinking, you can't complain that your children and grandchildren refuse to live with you.

There is a sentence in "Yan's Family Instructions": Those who are weathered are those who act from the top to the bottom, and those who act from the first to the latter. Therefore, if the father is not kind, the son will not be filial; if the brother is not friendly, the younger brother will be disrespectful; if the husband is not righteous, the wife will be disobedient. As an elder, if you can't change your backward thinking, you can't blame your children and grandchildren for not living with you. You prioritize sons over daughters and don't want to see your granddaughter. Then, in order to protect her own flesh and blood, your daughter-in-law can only ignore you. You forced her to choose between you and the child. Remember, a child is a mother's inverse scale and cannot be touched. If you do something else, your good-natured and kind-hearted daughter-in-law may not care about you, but if you hurt their children, even if your son tries to deal with the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, it will be difficult for you to get along in harmony. If you don't want to see your granddaughter, you just can't get along with yourself, and you can't get along with your son. END. Topic of the day: If you were Ms. Yang, would you be willing to live under one roof with such an in-law? Feel free to share your views in the comments section.
Related content