The law of wheat ears: the betrayal of a partner is related to the pursuit of perfection

time:2023-01-29 15:51:26source:novahomeonline.com author:Conjugal life
The law of wheat ears: the betrayal of a partner is related to the pursuit of perfection

Which partner is best for you? If you say what kind of partner is suitable for you, some friends may have the answer, but if you add the word "best" before the word "suitable", there are not many friends who can find the answer. Why do you say that? In the stage of people's pursuit of love and happiness, a field of wheat will appear in front of them. Everyone hopes to find the biggest and best ear of wheat in this field, but they can't find it. People don't believe that the person they met in the past is the biggest and best ear of wheat, people don't believe that the current partner is the biggest and best ear of wheat, and people don't know whether they will be able to find the biggest and best ear of wheat in the future. ear of wheat. In this state of being overwhelmed, distrustful of one's own vision, and prejudiced against one's partner, people can become extremely dissatisfied at the stage of running a marriage. Psychologists call people's excessive pursuit of perfection the law of wheat ears. In layman's terms, the law of wheat ears is a phenomenon in which people are always looking for a perfect life but never get a perfect life due to the uncertainty of the future, dissatisfaction with the status quo, and the inability to return to the past in the stage of managing marriage and life. . The law of wheat ears interprets the regrets of people's life, and also interprets people's attitude towards life management. And from an emotional point of view to analyze the law of wheat ears, I think it has something to do with the betrayal of the partner. Why do you say that? Kaelin's case provides the answer. Kalyn (pseudonym) is a married woman in her thirties, and she is also a very discontented woman. Kailin's husband has a successful career and is very responsible for the family, children and Kailin, but in Kailin's perception, Kailin feels that she is not happy. Most successful men have one thing in common: they spend very little time with their families, children, and wives. It is precisely for this reason that Kaelin feels empty and lonely in her marriage. Kailin complained more than once, and Kailin's husband had nothing to do with it. What about Kaelin? In order to relieve the stagnation in her heart, she chose a relatively simple job. During her work, she met a colleague of the opposite sex, and she fell under the crazy pursuit of the colleague of the opposite sex and betrayed her marriage. After Kaelin betrayed her marriage, she didn't feel that she was at fault. Instead, she thought that her husband was not suitable for her, and that an extra-marital colleague of the opposite sex was the most suitable partner for her. Therefore, Kailin, who betrayed the marriage, chose a divorce for the extramarital lover. After the divorce, Kaelin had an ambiguous relationship with the opposite sex outside of marriage for a period of time and was abandoned. Kaelin asked me why she was so unfortunate? I told Kaelin that men are not stupid. They know that women who betray their marriage have no sense of responsibility, and their minds are full of love and love. Therefore, men's attitude towards women who betray marriage is often ambiguous rather than with the purpose of marriage. socialize. Married men and women affected by the law of wheat ears place too much emphasis on love and affection. Therefore, once their partners do not behave as they wish, or their partners cannot meet their own emotional needs, such married men and women will betray them. marriage. Some friends may ask: "Don't these people know the price of betrayal of marriage? Don't these people have any sense of responsibility for their children and the family?" As adults, with mature thoughts, how can they not know the price of betrayal? Most of the married men and women affected by the law of wheat ears know the cost of betrayal, and they do so because they are unwilling. Unwilling to live a lifetime with someone you don’t love, unwilling to have a dull married life, under the influence of this unwillingness, the sense of responsibility of married men and women will decrease. After the heartbeat of the opposite sex outside of marriage, in order to calm down the unwillingness in his heart, he will choose to betray. In other words, people who betray their marriage have already prepared for divorce. These people are not afraid of divorce, nor are they afraid of divorce. The reason why he repented, blamed himself, and adopted various ways to save him during the divorce was because he was unwilling and worried. I am unwilling that the family I have run for a long time will be different from now on, I am unwilling to be abandoned, I am worried about my future, I am worried that my children will hate me, I am worried that my reputation will be ruined, I am worried that because of the spread of betrayal, I will never be able to do it again. I can't find a suitable partner, and I worry that after the divorce, I will be abandoned by the opposite sex outside of marriage and become a person with nothing. These unwillingness and worries make people who betray their marriage reluctant to divorce, but they will never be afraid of divorce. Why betray if you are afraid of divorce? After all, I am not afraid of divorce, and I am ready for divorce. As a victim, in the face of a partner's betrayal, the best option is divorce. Friends with children can temporarily choose the way of divorce and stay at home. As for whether they will remarry in the future, it depends on the development of the situation and the repentance attitude of the betrayal. In the mate selection stage, I chose the wrong partner and suffered betrayal. I hope that my friends will not make a second mistake again. If they can break, they will break up, and if they can leave, they will leave. Don’t have too many concerns and worries. Because divorce is the most favorable choice for a friend who has been betrayed. Divorce can ensure the best interests of friends. If you really want to give each other a chance, you need to give it after divorce. Not getting divorced will make friends bound by marriage, and the shadow of betrayal will be hard to erase. Once divorced, although friends will still be tortured by their partner's betrayal, but since they have divorced, the other party is no longer his wife or husband, and the inner pain will be relatively reduced.
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