The stronger the independent motivation, the stronger the ability to solve the couple's problems, do you know why?

time:2023-01-29 author:Unexpected situation
The stronger the independent motivation, the stronger the ability to solve the couple's problems, do you know why?

Psychologists believe that the peak of people's independence motivation occurs not at the 18-year-old mitzvah, but at the first job people get. Because people who have jobs have basically achieved economic independence, no longer need to rely on their parents, and can live independently. The so-called independent motivation refers to people's desire to complete certain things independently and to do certain things independently. It is a psychological phenomenon and attitude towards life that people rely on themselves without relying on others. It can be said that people with stronger independent motivation are more able to manage their lives well, while people with weaker independence are more difficult to manage their lives well. Because the strength of independent motivation represents people's attitude towards setbacks, tribulations, misfortunes, difficulties and problems, and also represents people's perseverance, determination, courage and self-confidence. From the perspective of independent motivation, I believe that the stronger the independent motivation, the stronger the ability of people to solve marital problems. Why do you say that?

First, independent thinking and cognition of marriage and feelings determine people's ability to solve husband and wife problems

Family, Ma Bao Nan, Fu Di Mo and other similar married men and women have always been controlled by their parents, relatives and friends. They have no independent thoughts of themselves, and their independent motivation is weak. At the same time, they do not have the ability to solve husband and wife problems. When such people have problems in their marriage, they will only seek advice and help from others, rather than relying on themselves to solve them. And other people are other people after all, and it is impossible to understand people's real conditions. Therefore, the suggestions given are often inconsistent with the actual situation and cannot solve the problem of husband and wife at all. People with strong and independent motivation have independent thinking, have the ability to distinguish right from wrong, can follow moral standards of behavior and the responsibility distribution system in marriage, and solve problems between husband and wife in a targeted manner. In addition, people with strong independent motives have a deeper understanding of marriage and marital relationships than those with weak independent motives. Therefore, people with strong independent motives can not only solve husband and wife problems, but also strengthen their relationship with their partners through husband and wife problems. feelings between.

Second, hard-working character comes from strong independent motivation

People with weak independent motivation cannot endure hardship, Unable to withstand the slightest setbacks and hardships, such married men and women, when encountering life problems, will be like a child, crying and looking for their parents, hoping that they can protect themselves. People with strong and independent motivation are different. No matter what difficulties, tribulations, or setbacks they encounter, they will rely on their own ability to solve them. In the stage of solving life problems, no matter how much suffering they endure, they will not care too much. Hard-working noble character, derived from a strong independent motivation. And this noble character is conducive to the solution of husband and wife problems. Because people with hard-working characters know well that life is not easy, they can understand the hard work of their wives or husbands, and they can respect and love their wives or husbands. Just imagine, at the stage of problems between husband and wife, if friends can understand and respect their partners, can the problems with their partners be solved? Most of the problems between husband and wife stem from lack of understanding, disrespect, disapproval, and lack of concern. If friends understand and respect, they will be able to relieve their partner's troubles, and if their partner's troubles are relieved, husband and wife problems will also disappear. .

Three, people with strong and independent motivation know the importance of love.

The more they care about their partner, the more they value Marriage, people demand more from their partners, friends, do you agree with this? I don't agree. I think that people who care more about their partners and pay more attention to marriage have less requirements for their partners and more requirements for themselves. Because the more you ask your partner, the easier it will arouse your partner's rebelliousness and disgust. And the less you demand from your partner and the more you demand from yourself, the easier it is for people to get their partner's love and care. People with strong independent motives are well aware of this. Therefore, such people will not have too many demands on their partners. They will take the initiative to change for their partners with a lover's heart, and try their best to meet their partners' emotional and material needs. Maybe some friends will ask: "The key between husband and wife is to give to each other, why should I change for my partner first?" It's true that husband and wife focus on giving each other, but there is a premise for mutual giving, and there must be a Pay first. If only one party pays, or if both husband and wife are waiting for the other to pay for themselves first, then people will be greatly disappointed under the influence of this selfish psychological behavior. There is only one reason for the big disappointment, people's expectations will fall, and the partner will not necessarily give for himself first, or the partner will give for himself in a form that he cannot understand or accept. Suppose people treat their partners with love, and pay for their partners first to meet their partners' needs. When your partner is in a good mood or is satisfied, if you euphemistically put forward your suggestions and demands for your partner, then people's status in their partner's heart will rise rapidly, and their partner will be willing to change for them. There is no love for no reason, no care for no reason, in the stage of husband and wife relationship management, there must be one person who sets an example first. The person who sets the example first must be someone with strong independent motivation, because this type of person knows that loving others can make their partners love them more and treat them better.
Related content